Worst
by Kuro49
Summary: Warnings for Masochistic!Kira. Slight GinKira. No matter how Izuru saw it, Captain Ichimaru had always been the worst.


I never really even liked Izuru but I think I fell in love with him when I saw those M qualities of his because seriously, he is so masochistic, maybe even more after Gin left. And when his sword was revealed, I think he gained a few S points, but still, however you see it, Gin fucked him up real bad. I like M!Izuru and I like tied up!Izuru even though it is all jsut happening in my head. D: (Gosh, I am filthy -shamed face-)

I don't own anything.

XXX

**Worst**

XXX

His knees hit the ground and the tight bindings of rough ropes holds his wrists together behind his back. There is a finger leading a trail, from collarbone to chin, his head is tilted up and he keeps his eyes close.

Because he knows exactly who he is. The fear has long since lost its worth.

There is a palm resting gently over the back of his neck, softly caressing the ends of his hair, gleaming a parch straw yellow in the light.

He leans back against the touch and he leans in close, lips brushing against stray locks.  
_  
"It's been fun, Kira."_

And then Captain Ichimaru slashes through the binds that hold him together.

His eyes flutter open.

The smile is present.

He crumbles to the ground.

And the tears are finally flowing down his cheeks.

000

His eyes hurt.

And he didn't need to see to know that they were both swollen because the short doze of sleep had only accomplished everything that he didn't want to come face to face with in the morning after.

His arms and legs were heavy and it felt as though every cell of his body was trying to apprehend the situation at hand, only to fail miserably each and every time this happened. The occurrence was on repeat and the pain was almost feverish enough to engulf his entire body in flames.

He sat up in his futon, sick and tired because the room was suffocating the last breath from between his lips and he had been crying in his sleep again. He had known too well. Since the man of his recurring dreams had left, he was filling up to the brink and last night, he was overflowing with emotions of the worst kind.

Izuru Kira was aching all over and the exhaustion just refused to let him go.

Pushing the futon quilt away, he felt like a pinned down specimen being gawked at in amusement. The imaginary stares made his head spin like a kaleidoscope and the sun's rays made him groan out loud. Morning was dragging him out and the warmth that he had gathered over night was disappearing fast.

Kira crawled out and by the time his palms had touched the sliding paper doors, he was already exhausted. A ragged breath escaped his lips and he felt sick to the stomach from everything combined.

The last smile, the last turn of that head to look his way, the silver by the tear in the sky.

It was a sight that had scorched a reminder deep within his dreams because it wasn't until now did he realized that he had been tied down all along by the soft coaxes and empty smiles of his captain. He was set free, like a caged bird flying in the sky for the first time.

And.

He was falling.

000

Kira pulled the screens open.

A rush of fresh air and the sunlight was no longer filtering in.

He lay down once again.

And the cool wooden floorboards kept his back bent straight for those misused wings to grow back.

Izuru could barely look at the sky; even the clouds and that blue brought a sharp pain. The dew had long since settled and over the soft rustlings of the trees by his room, he could hear people bustling in the early workings of the day. Nothing had changed.

Despite a personal evolution.

There was no darkness, not even when he rested an arm over his face because the sun filtrated through everything and he knew he was glowing in an unhealthy shade of fleshy tones. He had been kept in for too long and Captain Ichimaru's shadow had been shading him since day one.

A choked sob escaped because the imaginary rope burns were fading and those past memories of a well-constructed cage was caving in on realization. The captain had left for a world outside of this one but the smile could never go. Kira had known, from the very start.

His restraints were finally wearing thin and freedom had never tasted so bad. Like bile rising from the back of his throat.

Kira could feel the wrench of parched pain because he was in a manner he never wanted anyone to see; even when the tears have finally ran dry.

The betrayal still couldn't fit down his throat; he couldn't swallow it as though it was nothing because it was the revelation of a secret, the last syllable of that confession, the last regret as death flashed before those eyes. It was the key to the locks that bind him to _him_.

Kira felt pretty pathetic, like a sore loser who just refused to give up. Because in both dreams and reality, that smile would remain, even with the mellowing of time.

He let out a breath.

A soft realization along with the absence of those long pale fingers to guide the way, like a fox with a lantern pointing straight into a dead end.

Captain Ichimaru said goodbye because to him, it had always been just a good time. So when the fun was over and business came along, he gave a short wave and never turned back. And only if he could, Kira would like to tell him that he liked being tied up than let loose to roam without something to follow after.

Izuru rubbed his face into the warmth of his palms.

Captain Ichimaru really was the worst.

XXX Kuro

If you failed to understand, this all happened in his head, the only movements that he made was get out of futon, crawl over to door, and lie down again. Izuru is doomed to rot at this rate D: And afterall this, I think Izuru just wants to say that he missed Gin, A LOT. :) Btw, this is my first Bleach attempt! Please do tell how I did with characterizations? ;)


End file.
